BE what you BElieve!

BE what you BElieve!

Saturday, May 31, 2014

maleficent=magnificent

MALEFICENT = MAGNIFICENT!  totally one of my all time fave fantasy movies it was pure joy! liked this story WAAAAAAAY better than the sleeping beauty fable of olden days.





probably gonna see this one again on the BIG screen!
as for the rest I gave myself permission to have whatever I wanted for my birthday best I could come up with! lolol
hamburger helper lasagna
garlic bread
peanut M & Ms (theatre box)
chicken alfredo and garlic bites from dominos
that's it all I ate all day, apparently my food dreams are kinda simple nope no lobster theadore for me no filet minone, for me a feast is hamburger helper! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I LOVE what a total and unapologetic dork I am! I got almost no steps as I walked from house to car to theatre and back, other than that I barely moved...............I did do an all day Love Boat-a-thon which I thouroughly enjoyed. I knew that several guest stars repeated but wow Michelle Lee (knots landing) was on 3 times so far and I'm still on season 1, Robert urich twice, Maureen mccormic twice.........and to my shock Kathy bates was on and she was young and thin!
gotta say as far as days go my B-day was pretty gosh darn GREAT!  there were 10 of my family of friends who went and that in its-self is wonderful that that many people would go just because I wanted to , several of whom actively dislike the fantasy genre. I will say however ALL were won over and agree that Angelina was BORN to play this role in the way Lynda Carter IS Wonder Woman and Hugh Jackman IS Wolverine.....................

Friday, May 30, 2014

happy birthday to ME!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRqkTVOovPQ




it's my birthday so I thought I'd help everyone out who is searching for that perfect last minute gift idea................TIMMY is a greedy boy the kind who wants to have his cake and eat it too! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!






Timothy L Martin's photo.

Thursday, May 29, 2014

something is missing.............

something is missing in my journey and that's a partner, no not a romantic partner just someone I can talk to about progress, failures and the lot. this blog is fine as a vent and a record and don't get me wrong I love the comments but I just want people I can work out with, go for walks, swap recipes, etc etc IN PERSON in that moment and I know that's why I keep going back to weight watchers. for the meetings their plan doesn't work for me at all, it's too carb loaded and has too many veggies/fruits which I don't like and wont eat (NEVER BLEECH)
so basically I paid $40 just to feel human connection, thats' expensive and kinda sad.
I'm gonna have to look around and see if I can find somewhere to host a weightloss group, my place is out too many kids not enough room. lol mayhaps a bookstore we'll see, but I HAVE to de something because I'm sick and tired of walking this road all by my lonesome...........the cyber world is wonderful but sometimes you just need to "FEEL" a person!
on the eating front I had....
glazed donut
chicken tenders (5)
2 doriotos , yes 2 of the new blue jacked YUCKY! lol
gardettos bacon/cheddar crackers
chicken breast
 scrambled egg with cheese
ham
2 coconut dream cookies chocolate covered (ICKY)
accidentaly erased my steps but was a BUSY night so probably a few more than usual.


on the world front I was so saddened by maya angelo's passing, she was an angel among us and will be missed.............................(here's a fave poem)
"Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.
Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.
You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise."




... picture quotes maya angelou maya angelou quotes Maya Angelou pictures




Wednesday, May 28, 2014

once upon a dream

once upon a dream..............
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYrD_l3juoU





getting pretty gosh darn jazzed for Friday besides bein my bday a bunch of us are gonna see maleficent! WOO HOO!
 as far as today it was okey dokey, busy but not too too bad.
I ate:
chicken tenders
ramen
chicken breast
pork chop
ritz crackers
hamburger
hot dogs
bbq chips
steak and gravy biscuit from hardees (2)
lemon muffin
I also got 8390 steps, below my 10,000 but my knee is acting up so I didn't want to push it. I know the difference in an I need aleve twinge and an UH-OH twinge and this was the latter. gonna take some aleve anyway, elevate, and wear a brace today and see where that takes me.



Tuesday, May 27, 2014

fmm: animals

Friend Makin Mondays: Animals

FMM
Happy Monday everyone, I was sat here cuddling with my dogs after we spent the morning at a fundraising event and thought animals would be a good topic for this week (and a good excuse for photos!)
If you’ve taken part in FMM before then you are familiar with the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to read and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!
Animals
1. What is your favorite domestic animal?
MAN! lmao
2. What is your favorite farm animal?
bison, alas they really don't exist in the wild anymore
3. What is your favorite wild animal?
the mustang I love their free spirit and speed
4. Which animal describes you the best?
bear, solitary likes to be left alone and perfectly happy hibernating lol
5. If you were able to come back as an animal which one would it be?
I have a tiger totem and I love the fierceness and strength of it so that's what I'd be.
6. What do you think about zoos?
the good ones have done a lot to save animals that would otherwise have gone extinct and I enjoy a good zoo.
7. What do you think about animals in circuses?
as long as they're treated well I have no issue with it, gone are the days when there was enough open spaces to return all critters to their natural habitat. zoos and circuses have kept some animals from going the way of the dodo much sooner than they would have..........animal testing worries me far more! of course I grew up on a farm and we had cows, pigs, goats, horses, dogs, cats,etc etc
8. Do you have a favorite animal charity you like to support?
no I support local animal shelters or rehabbers once they get into the "charity" aspect they are simply money making ventures with no heart or soul. like peta which wants all of us to return our pets to the wild and be vegans but kill 97% of the animals taken in by their shelters.
9. Do you have a favorite ‘animal movie?
toss up between black beauty and the black stallion


Have a great day and I look forward to reading your answers, hopefully with lots of photos.
Now it is your turn to answer the questions, don’t forget to come back here and link your answers in the comments below.
Sarah xxx

Monday, May 26, 2014

happy memorial day!

remember those warriors who have given their all and remember those who have survived even though their lives have forever changed. the sacrifice does not end with the tour of duty!

Sunday, May 25, 2014

intuition

intuition indeed!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ilh1ewceco
so this going by "instinct" thing has worked out pretty well to show me where I'm at and what I need to do to get to the next level and it applies well to all aspects of my life. I's gonna continue this until sometime on my vaca still mayhaps june 1st but I need to look at a calendar, and of course don't have one handy! LMAO
I ate:
chicken tenders
Cheetos (handful)
peanut butter on ritz crackers
scrambled eggs
zero bar (kingsize)
sausage
pork skins
1 potato wedge
I got 8675 steps I was tied to the register most of the night! lolol so why are the dogs barking?
saw this and facebook and by the by...................."I may have said it with a drawl slower than a crawl but I still did way better than the rest of y'all!

90% Of People Can't Pronounce This Whole Poem. You Have To Try It.

If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.

After trying the verses, a Frenchman said he’d prefer six months of hard labor to reading six lines aloud.

 every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.

After trying the verses, a Frenchman said he’d prefer six months of hard labor to reading six lines aloud.

...



Saturday, May 24, 2014

silly happy

the silliest things make me happy, like I got the 1st two seasons of the love boat. I'm mr cynical and I enjoy non happy endings to books and movies but occasionally I like silly fluff and the love boat is like tv cotton candy a sweet confection with no substance that is exceedingly sappy yet makes me have the warm fuzzies! so YEAH BABY.............the love boat!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbO2hlNb6w8&feature=player_embedded


as for the rest it's been ok lol
I ate:
spaghetti
garlic bread
Italian sausage (2)
oreo (4)
2 sausage biscuits (hardees)
country fried steak biscuit with gravy (hardees)
bbq Vienna sausage
ritz garlic butter crackers
I got 14392 steps
I also got some fun new "toys" lol the Lenormand deck which is a fortune telling deck of 36 cards and really has nothing to do with tarot. I simply want to see how gifted I am. a book on said deck and some blank tarot cards so I can prototype my new deck to see how it actually works (I have one card completed and three more in the figuring it out stage. I also got some astrodice because I need to bone up on my astrology and this seems like a cool way to do it. I also got new bags for all my decks so I can dispose of those pesky boxes and house them in style!
it's time I ponied up in all aspects of my life, mental, physical, and spiritual so that's the plan..........no more stalling and half-assing time to put it in gear. shoot long past time truth be told. so the game plan is simply JUST DO EVERYTHING!





lmao

Friday, May 23, 2014

real food YES!

so I ate real food yesterday with no ill affects and I am THRILLED and FILLED! lol
I ate 2 homemade hamburgers (I cook em in water in a skillet until they're done then empty pan and   brown them so WAY less grease)
a pecan pie (small one in tin from wally)
sm bag bbq chips
this morning I'm eating a plate of left over spaghetti I crumbled my left over hamburger and cut up an Italian sausage to put in the sauce then sprinkled with romano cheese
garlic bread
that's all so not overdone but VERY satisfied.
did I mention how much I HATE ginger-ale lmao it taste like you boiled tree roots and dirt to me (so does licorice)
gonna do some yoga to see where I'm at physically then mayhaps some belly dancing too!

Thursday, May 22, 2014

ick pooey

my tummy has been ick pooey but I finally managed to keep down some ritz crackers and a couple of chicken tenders after LOTS of ginger ale and pepto. I have been farting like crazy all day everything went to gas. I felt like I was stiffler in American pie trying to gross people out! lmao
every time I moved I tooted and goodness gracious if I bent over for anything it released a POOTicane that I'm surprised didn't leave a hole in my britches! TMI? lolol
but that's easing off too thank goodness. and the cramps have lessened too.
I ate
ritz crackers
chicken tenders
ginger ale
rolaids!
forgot to set my pedo so no clue probably over 10,000 though I still did my work!

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

A DAY WITHOUT YOU..........

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_aAf8oe6NwE


A DAY WITHOUT YOU WOULD BE A DAY WITH ME, and I'm GOOD with that! lmao


havin some tummy issues, everything turned to gas/bloat and I was having cramps so I left work an hour early and took some pepto and ginger ale. hopefully it's just something I ate and not the start of something!
speaking of food I ate:
chicken tenders
spicy chicken sandwich with bacon and swiss (mayhaps the culprit)
I also ate 2 of the yellow mystery flavor doritos (YUK!) it was VERY citrus in a ugh way
that's it I was in bed by 11am yesterday and slept til almost 9pm.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

rest aka lazy days

yep I've had 2 GREAT lazy days.............I left the house once for my monthly tarot group and that was it. other than that I've hardly moved and it feels GREAT! I slept and slept and then after I woke up I took a nap! then I had a siesta and a lounge and some dozing off too! sometimes we have to listen to our bodies and just relax...........
on the food front I had:
teddy grahmns
salsbury steak and gravy
biscuits
scrambled eggs
oatmeal cookie
chili (no beans)
tomato soup
grilled cheese
vegetable dip
wheat crackers
potato skin (1)
chicken tenders (sm microwave ones)  3
oatmeal pie
and before y'all tink OMG what a pig! that's Sunday and Mondays food intake! lolol
I got virtually no steps and my poor achy feet are really kinda happy. I DESPERATELY need new work shoes but I've been putting it off because truthfully I'd rather buy a season of something on dvd or go out to eat than spend money I don't get to enjoy and we're supposed to be switching over to shoes bought thru the company but I don't know exactly when.







now lemme say I agree and disagree with this 100%! lmao everyone should be able to wear whatever they want to the beach but you should be prepared to see pictures of said self and if it's painful for you to look at spare everyone else the discomfort. my only issue is when it gets obscene and the bikini looks like dental floss up an elephants ass. I would NEVER wear at speedo at my current weight but hey if you wanna wear a mankini you go right ahead!

Monday, May 19, 2014

books

so I am an admitted book nerd and hardback snob. I DESPISE kindles, nooks, tablets and all other forms of electronic reading. it's like someone reciting an opera instead of singing it. you get a pale imitation of grandeur.
I have always had a love affair with the written word and I probably always shall. books were my salvation when I was bereft and my stability when I lose my way. I read a variety of things and am always interested in books on almost any subject. westerns, history, sci-fi, fantasy, metaphysical, reference, everything from A COOK IN TIME by Joanne Pence to ZEN A WAY OF LIFE by Christmas Humphries
Photo: What do you think? It's a clever caption, isn't it, though I doubt that ring would hold all the books most of us own. It would be a good conversation piece, though. Melissa Pickett sent the picture.






of course I have many books on weight loss and healthy living some are wonderful and have served me well some are dry as toast and somber but all bring something to the mix.............sticking with the health category here are some of my faves (in no particular order)
Richard Simmons better body book
Jillian Michaels making the cut
Bob Harper are you ready
Julie Hadden fat chance
Valerie Bertinelli losing it
Dolphina bellydance
Raquel Welch ,Raquel
Mario Lopez knockout fitness (this one is "pretty" and mostly useless as a guide but did I mention he's pretty?!) lol
Bob Paris , flawless, beyond built, and prime.
Robert Atkins new diet revolution (this ones my "BIBLE")






so I picked a random shelf next to me to illustrate my taste in literature
George carlin last words
dean koontz odd Thomas books
dan millman peaceful warrior books
anna sewell black beauty
molly wizenberg a homemade life
the firefly dance (various)
Margaret cho I have chosen to stay and fight
jk rowling harry potter series
christpher palonini inheritance cycle
edgar allen poe the complete works
Stephen king the dark tower series
gawa ni pony boy horse follow closely
atkins new diet revolution
ann webb the proper care of tarantulas
bette midler the saga of baby bette
Rachel Pollack 78 degrees of wisdom a book of tarot
and that's only a small sample of my tatses! lol





this I loved I posted it on Fb and got some wonderful responses............and if I were gonna gift y'all I can only narrow it to 3 by the way it's be
DUNE
THE STAND
THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA (it's ONE book released in 7 parts! lol)
now for something far less cerebral and more likely to get your blood flowing I give you ............
Photo: mayhaps i'll re-enact the scene from 10 on the beach with this strapping lad in my dreams! so on that note I shall see y'all later! lolol *evil wink* ;)


lololol








EVIL LAUGH! LMAO
 ok back briefly to weight loss....
Photo: LOL! #B1039
LMAO


Sunday, May 18, 2014

the craving vs the reality

so we all know how horrible cravings are and sometimes it lives up to it's hype but NOT usually. especially if the craving is something non-special and pedestrian like frozen waffles. now lemme say that's the only kind I've ever had because when I go out I get pancakes but I like them soft and fluffy where-as I want my waffles crispy. I just cant imagine microwave pancakes would be anything but rubbery as ALL microwaveable dough products are. (I HATE micro hot pockets, sandwiches, burgers and the like) so after 3 days of working for these blasted waffles what is the verdict. EH they were good and I enjoyed them but it's certainly not an experience I'm gonna write Anthony bourdain about! lolol it did finally cure my craving thank goodness.
today should be a good day I'm off work and I have my monthly tarot group so that will be fun, plus I have my last pay it forward gift to deliver. I didn't see why I needed to pay $3 for shipping when I'll see them in person tonight (shhhhhhh they don't know!) lol
as for food I ate:
honey teddies (a generic teddy grahmn)
Cheetos (I've been eating on a bag for several days now that normally would be 1 sitting!)
triscuit
ham, scrambled egg and cheese sandwich
ham
key lime donut
so far thats' it I had no time to eat dinner at work so I'm done for the day.
I walked 14598 steps
so is there a craving that ALWAYS lives up to the hype for y'all?
for me I dunno it used to be hardees biscuits but I've been disappointed the last few times I went. I really enjoy cheddars at this point but I don't crave it so much. red lobster all you can eat shrimp is another thing I enjoy and if I skip the biscuits and fries I can stay 100% low carb but alas that special seems to run less and less. mayhaps I'm just starting to get a handle on eating as a whole.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

the strength of ASGARD

had an ok day and hopefully my horrible craving for waffles I've had for days and days will be quenched this morning! lemme tell ya a couple of days ago there was 1/2 a bottle of syrup and 2 waffles in the freezer so when I wanted waffles I bought one of those small 6packs of aunt jemima frozen ones came home cooked em slathered butter on them and went to get the syrup out of the cabinet and you guessed it nothing, so someone ate 1/2 bottle of syrup on 2 waffles but apparently it was santa coming early because no one here will cop to it!
so I have all these darn waffles and nothing to eat them with, I HATE fruit or cool whip or any of that stuff I'm strictly a butter and syrup kinda guy ( I may eat waffles/pancakes once a year) but I was too exhausted to go to the store so yesterday I stopped at redners and did my shopping everything EXCEPT syrup! lol of course it was pouring rain so I took the kids to the bus stop and went back to get my syrup (in gym shorts and a tank no less and I NEVER go out without bein dressed) well darn it to heck frozen waffles do NOT reheat well one nasty bite and I was done with that so this morning I stopped at wal mart and got another package which are in the toaster over as I write this................wish me luck after all that they better be some gal darned tasty waffles indeed! LMAO
other than that I ate :
chicken tenders
Cheetos
ham
pepperoni
ceasar salad
American cheese
and fixin to eat waffles! lol
I also got 11473steps and about 20 minutes of yoga.


I found this cool site with interesting workouts so I thought I'd share one check out the link for all kinds of game of thrones, superhero, etc etc workouts to spice up your sweat!
Get the strength and body of Thor with the ultimate Thor workout!

You can see more workouts based off of your favorite superheroes, TV shows, movies and more at http://bit.ly/SuperWorkouts.

Friday, May 16, 2014

venting

I don't know about y'all but for me it's almost never the BIG stuff that sends me into a homicidle frenzy it's that little nothing thing that hits me at the wrong time and place and man oh man was I there this morning. 3rd shift is treated like everyones step child but we do the bulk of the work and last night was a bear. I had a truck to put away a milk order issues with vendors and recovering from the disaster that 2nd shift left me................but I got everything done and was leaving when a first shift **************** person actually came to get me and tell me I didn't do my job. I had taken out the garbage and layed the new bag over the can but had gotten interrupted before I actually put it in the can. WTF? seriously you're gonna come at me with that.............I blew a gasket. in the first place it was the barista who is low man on totem pole and NOT my boss, 2ndly I had set up his next round of coffee for him (not my job nor required of me) and he doesn't do half the stuff he's supposed to on any given day. I may have yelled, I might have curse, I know I went off to the manager about the 90 year old tiddy baby and he better pick his battles with me because now I'm actively gonna make it more unpleasant and not so easy for him. petty is as petty does I guess! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
not even sure why this tweaked me so badly other than I'm exhausted and it was a BAD night but anywho I feel better getting it out and letting it go so on to more important stuff
I ate:
triscuit dill
ham
chicken tenders (5)
potato wedges (5 tiny ones)
onion rings (the chip not the real ones)
peanut butter cookies (2)
I got 12,756 steps
so gonna watch a couple of episodes of wild wild west and go to bed. it's pouring here we're supposed to get between 2 and 4 inches today according to the weather. so it should be good sleeping conditions!

Thursday, May 15, 2014

the plan?!

ok so I need to do something foodwise but still kinda ponderin it. lo carb is of course gonna be involved because other than biscuits occasionally I don't really enjoy bread anymore. half the time If I fix a burger or dog in a bun I take one bite and toss the bread so why bother...............mayhaps i'll just eat salads I found a yummy looking one online!

lololololol now that's my kinda feast. it actually looks like my plate when I go to a breakfast buffet!
seriously though probably gonna eliminate bread or simply allow myself one cheat meal a week (NOT a cheat-day ONE meal!) and a timed one at that, gonna stick to the food journaling and restart my 3 times a week (or more) workouts now that the weather is better.
now I have a totally unrelated health question for y'all my 17 year old nephew has been told by his dentist that he MUST have his wisdom teeth out asap BEFORE he goes into the military. he is asymptomatic as they are in and he has no issues so I think it's BULLSHIT! of course the dentist wants to yank em out but for me that's stupid and apparently the only country that routinely does this is the USA with NO scientific basis at all. the statistics have been proven false and most removed from the ads. I say that's stupid it's like removing an appendix because you MIGHT have a apendicitus. what do y'all think? does your country still do this?
on the food end I ate :
pork chop
Cheetos (handful)
scrambled eggs
peanut butter cookies (2)
ham
roast beef
beef sausage
garlic bread
and I got 10,340 steps

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

weigh in

ok so I've been eating off plan whatever I want for a month and I weigh 209...........so that's a really good thing I haven't put on any weight eating what I want so theoretically if I cut back and change from junk to healthy food and MOVE I should be able to lose.............theoretically LOLOL
my body tends to pick a weight and hang tough so we shall see. last time I was stuck at 226 for 3 years then it dropped to 216 for a year or so............gonna figure out what I wanna do and restart on june 1st. cause I already have birthday plans on may 30th so theres no point in going gung ho only to go off plan. at least I KNOW I'm not packing on the pounds.
on another note I'm so happy I'm giddy today two of my all time fave artists tori amos and dolly parton have new albums today..............of course now the quandary is which to listen to first so I let the Stereo Gods decide and hit loaded both into my cd player and hit random, so Tori it is!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH69XxWwHuo check it out it's fabulous!

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

FMM on a tues

Posted on May 12, 2014 by
FMM
Happy Monday everyone and welcome to another Friend Makin Monday. Hope you had a wonderful weekend. Yesterday was Mothers Day, but my husband and I never celebrated as our mums are in England and they celebrate Mothers Day in March there – no idea why, as Fathers Day is celebrated the same day in England as it is in the US. After seeing lots of photos of people with their mums on Facebook it got us thinking about when we were kids (long before we knew each other) and sharing our memories – hence this weeks topic :)
If you’ve taken part in FMM before then you are familiar with the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to read and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!
Childhood Memories
1. I know I love posting photos and you guys do too, so this first one you will love. Post a photo of you as a baby/small child.



2. Describe yourself as a child in three words.
bliss of ignorance (pre-orphaned) disillusioned lost soul after
3.What was one of your first school memories?
I got my first paddling from my favorite teacher in 1st grade. she asked us to please be quite as she had a headache and the others were too loud (in my opinion) so I YELLED at them to be quite because mrs Phillips had a headache! LMAO the best deeds do not go unpunished!
4. How did you get to school?
my mama took me the first couple of years because when my parents divorced we moved out of our district and she didn't want me to be traumatized, then after she died I rode the bus til my dad died then I lived with my grandparents whose property was literally behind the school so I walked til tenth grade then I rode the bus that year and for 11th/12th I usually drove................oh shoot I forgot as I'm approaching old fart status I should have said I walked uphill in a snowstorm both ways! lol
5. What was your favorite toy?
my fisher price barn , it mooed when you opened the doors I still have it and i'll age myself and say it's made out of wood! lol

6. Did you have a favorite place you used to go on vacation to as a child?
panama city florida I had an aunt there and there was a wonderfully fun amusement park called the miracle strip alas it's a parking lot now.
7. If you had siblings did you ever get dressed in similar outfits?
no not really as she's a girl
8. Do you remember learning to ride your bike?
yes I was 6 and it was a fully decked out evil kenevil dirt bike
9. Were you a thumb sucker as a child?
no I didn't suck my thumb at all I guess I wasn't nervous but my sister did it horribly
10.What is one of your favorite childhood memories?
I used to go to bed and then getback up and sit in my mamas lap and watch old horror movies like Dracula and the wolfman all night. I was like 3 to 5
Have a great day and thanks for sharing my childhood memories with me.
Now it is your turn to answer the questions, don’t forget to come back here and link your answers in the comments below.
Sarah xxx
 

Monday, May 12, 2014

painful but neccesary insights

NOT REALLY I SIMPLY LOVE ANASTACIA'S VIDEO! lolol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TnOy6HEf7HU


as for me I had a great mothers day and hopefully got some insights (hard won not wanted) into my childhood and patterns................
see I WOPRSHIP my mama's memory she was one hell of a woman , always at my pta stuff, the cool mom baked cakes for school functions, showed off my silly drawings as if they were Rembrandts. she stood up for me fiercely and allowed me to be me, I mean seriously what mom buys her 8 year old son the Barbie dream house and encourages him to be whatever he wants. she even conquered her worst fear for me, and that's something only real love could bring about. see she almost drowned as a child so she was terrified of the water but I LOVE swimming so that last summer she forced herself to learn to swim. I can remember her shuddering with fear when she's get in the water but she did it!
I'm tempered like my mama, hell I even look like her. we had a bond not many have and I guess therein lies part of the problem, we were so close we shut everyone else out, so here goes a look at an inconvienent truth.
I have one sister and honestly we've never been close , but I'm trying to fix that and so is she.
it's not even our fault either, see we're like 18 months apart but Audra was very sick when she was born. she didn't have an esophageous (spell-check) so they had to cut open her stomach and take out small intestines and make one. she had to eat out of a tube for years and wasn't really home untilshe was almost 3. I resented my mama being away from me HORRIBLY! she was MINE and I don't like to share!
i'll give y'all a cliff note version of events. my daddy had one sister, Shirley, his parents were incapable of emotional support (his dad was an abused alcoholic and his mom was raised by an alcoholic father cause her mom died when she was a baby) or even any normal hugs, kisses, so both my dad and aunt were closed off from human contact. my mama's family is VERY touchy/huggy/feely so I'm not even sure how my parents got together but it wasn't enough for my mama she needed more. well there was a swimming pool in the next county (allens lake aka spring valley beach if you're in bama) and they had summer family passes so my mama took me and my sister every weekend and my aunt's husband took their 3 kids so eventually (not sure when exactly) my mama and my uncle had an affair (no blood relation) divorced their prospective spouses and got married making my 1st cousins my step brothers and sister............it was a BIG scandal in our tint little town but I really never noticed she died shortly after that leaving me devastated and alone. I'd never been close to my daddy cause he was never there and I hated his new wife and her 2 daughters. it didn't help that she didn't like boys and I was treated like a "step-child" while my sister was the "REAL" child. and she forced me to go to church where as a budding gay I was told I was evil and going to hell. it certainly didn't help my self esteem or confidence and I was miserable and I'm sure a bitter pill to all around me. I moved pretty quickly in with my grandparents (yep the emotionally barren dads parents!) which was in its-self not ideal.at 16 I moved out got emancipated, finshed high school and shut out the world. I really only had 2 friends at all (tressie and janet I LOVE ya'll more than you could ever know!) that kept me from going insane! and after high school I bummed around bama for a couple of years before moving to fl and starting to heal. now this whole time I've been estranged from my sister because in addition to being emancipated I sued my step-monster for my share of daddys insurance (she had lied and told everyone it didn't pay out) I didn't talk to my sister for years , then when we did it was a horrid betrayal/nightmare on both our parts which I shall NEVER discuss on here needless to say I handled it rather badly and I was like 24 and a total jerk. I cut all of our pictures apart and mailed her her half with a note saying the only reason I didn't destroy these is because MY mama took them............NOT my finest hour and a BIG regret.
anywho when my grandma passed we began to speak on rare occasions and last year I made the decision to keep in regular contact and to try and build a new relationship based on who we are now and separate from all the baggage and distrust in the past. I wll admit when she tried to tell me our childhood from her point of view I got ANGRY, really really ANGRY! see by her recollection she was abused, not loved, neglected, and not wanted. it felt like an attack on my most cherished memories and my mama (who is on a GIANT pillar in my mind) but as I've had time to ponder and think back I can see some of what she said ringing true, much as I'm loathe to admit it. how can 2 children be raised together and have totally opposite experiences? for whatever reason we did, that's all I know. I do believe her and im talking to her and letting her share with me and trying to integrate the 2 things into something cohesive..............and if anything it's making me feel even more loved by my mama.
I guess she shoplifted stuff (lipstick, jewelry) and wrote a ton of bad checks, even put stolen stuff in my sisters pockets.............I had no clue. I never saw a thing, she never involved me but I do remember one single time we got stopped outside howard bros dept store because she had put a lipstick in her pocket because her hands were full handling me and my sister...........and I remember my sister always bein in trouble of course I also remember her breaking every toy I ever got out of spite (I guess she resented me as much as I resented her for different reasons) not listening and in general being horrid. I've verified as much of this as I can thru 3rd parties and it's been a real eye opener. no one ever said anything because they knew I wouldn't believe them................
so I'm left with this my mama was a troubled soul who had her own issues but she loved me enough to not let any darkness into my world and to keep me innocent, pure, and wrapped in my blissful little world like the boy in the bubble. how can I possibly judge her when she loved me that much, so my sisters truth is her truth and it's ugly and sad and I mourn her having to live it but I also have my truth and it's as real as it gets. it's a wonderful thing I'm a Gemini because I "get" duality, it's not delusion or pretend it's simply what it was. so now I can be a better brother and a more forgiving person and I don't have to take off my rose colored glasses where my mama is concerned she was the best mama I could have ever hoped for and that she loved me enough to not want me involved in her issues speaks volumes for our relationship.
this is a real breakthrough for me as all of my food issues stem from losing my mama, food was the only thing I could ever count on to numb the pain and it never let me down even as it poisoned me and turned me into a fat slug who could barely tie my own shoes. I'm gonna do what I have suggested to so many, print this letter up and burn it, I don't need any angst there's nothing to forgive I give it to spirit and the universe I don't need anything holding me down or back any more and this old pain and loneliness serves no useful purpose in my life.
      



Sunday, May 11, 2014

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY Y'ALL!
THIS ONE'S FOR MY MAMA, THE GREATEST LADY I EVER KNEW, WE HAD A SPECIAL BOND AND I STILL FEEL HER WITH ME AFTER ALL THE YEARS. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY! ~

Saturday, May 10, 2014

NORMAL?

SO I GOT A COMMENT THAT MY BLOG WASNT USEFUL BECAUSE I EAT NORMAL? really? do I eat normal, not at all i don't think. lol of course i am NOT on a plan now as I've been trying to see what just portion control would do for the last month or so, still not sure cause it feels strange I've been in the weight loss wars for so long............
and of course yesterday i had waffles and then all day i had to sit on the toilet in misery. cest le vie I'm just not used to that many carbs and bread of any kind can set it off i guess the syrup was just too much and i paid for it.
 
so my experiment has moments of bliss and hours of horror but seems to be a good lesson to learn overall. I'm certainly better at listening to my body's signals and responding appropriately.
today i ate:
chicken breast
pecan pie (one of the 68 cent sm from wal mart)
ham steak
picked the toppings off of 3 slices of pizza (2 pepperoni, 1 bacon)
Cheetos
walnuts
mini ravioli (sm microwave size)
still that normal comment has me PONDERIN where I'm at and what i need/should do..........hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm something to ruminate on  indeed!

Friday, May 9, 2014

columbus day NOT!

real quick I got 11396 steps, I ate.........
waffles with butter syrup
ham steak'
handful of tater tots
1/4 English muffin (cinnamon/vanilla YUCK!)
chicken breast
sm micro ravioli
and now Columbus................UGH!
Columbus was an idiot and a murdering scoundrel I do NOT celebrate his day nor his actions or the LIES we teach children about him. educate yourself and neither will you! this is a repost NOT my letter but a native American and I feel the same way!
I would like to share with all of you what I have emailed to the Puerto Rican Governor.

Attention Sir Governor Alejandro;

I am Sachem (chief) Hawk Storm of Schaghticoke. We are of the Algonquin people on the the east coast.

I am speaking on behalf of our brothers and sisters who were decimated by this man with whom you choose to immortalize in the form of a theam park and statue. I implore you... to understand how truly wrong this action is. To us this would be no different than erecting a statue of Hitler and glorifying his tyrannical actions.

Im going to shar with you the true story of this man Christopher Columbus who this country holds such high regard for. And please know that if this plan goes forward there will be a worldwide voice that will cause a permanent mark in history on your name. You would het the same results you are looking for as far as publicity, economic growth, and unity with a theam park in honor of your original people. In doing that we, all thefirst nations people of north America would publicly support you.

I thank you for your time and attention.
Sachem Hawk Storm

If Christopher Columbus were alive today, he would be put on trial for crimes against humanity. Columbus' reign of terror, as documented by noted historians, was so bloody, his legacy so unspeakably cruel, that Columbus makes a modern villain like Saddam Hussein look like a pale codfish.

Question: Why do we honor a man who, if he were alive today, would almost certainly be sitting on Death Row awaiting execution?

If you'd like to know the true story about Christopher Columbus, please read on. But I warn you, it's not for the faint of heart.

Here's the basics. On the second Monday in October each year, we celebrate Columbus Day (this year, it's on October 11th). We teach our school kids a cute little song that goes: "In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue." It's an American tradition, as American as pizza pie. Or is it? Surprisingly, the true story of Christopher Columbus has very little in common with the myth we all learned in school.

Columbus Day, as we know it in the United States, was invented by the Knights of Columbus, a Catholic fraternal service organization. Back in the 1930s, they were looking for a Catholic hero as a role-model their kids could look up to. In 1934, as a result of lobbying by the Knights of Columbus, Congress and President Franklin Roosevelt signed Columbus Day into law as a federal holiday to honor this courageous explorer. Or so we thought.

There are several problems with this. First of all, Columbus wasn't the first European to discover America. As we all know, the Viking, Leif Ericson probably founded a Norse village on Newfoundland some 500 years earlier. So, hat's off to Leif. But if you think about it, the whole concept of discovering America is, well, arrogant. After all, the Native Americans discovered North America about 14,000 years before Columbus was even born! Surprisingly, DNA evidence now suggests that courageous Polynesian adventurers sailed dugout canoes across the Pacific and settled in South America long before the Vikings.

Second, Columbus wasn't a hero. When he set foot on that sandy beach in the Bahamas on October 12, 1492, Columbus discovered that the islands were inhabited by friendly, peaceful people called the Lucayans, TaĂ­nos and Arawaks. Writing in his diary, Columbus said they were a handsome, smart and kind people. He noted that the gentle Arawaks wereremarkable for their hospitality. "They offered to share with anyone and when you ask for something, they never say no," he said. The Arawaks had no weapons; their society had neither criminals, prisons nor prisoners. They were so kind-hearted that Columbus noted in his diary that on the day the Santa Maria was shipwrecked, the Arawaks labored for hours to save his crew and cargo. The native people were so honest that not one thing was missing.

Columbus was so impressed with the hard work of these gentle islanders, that he immediately seized their land for Spain and enslaved them to work in his brutal gold mines. Within only two years, 125,000 (half of the population) of the original natives on the island were dead.

If I were a Native American, I would mark October 12, 1492, as a black day on my calendar.

Shockingly, Columbus supervised the selling of native girls into sexual slavery. Young girls of the ages 9 to 10 were the most desired by his men. In 1500, Columbus casually wrote about it in his log. He said: "A hundred castellanoes are as easily obtained for a woman as for a farm, and it is very general and there are plenty of dealers who go about looking for girlsfrom nine to ten are now in demand."

He forced these peaceful natives work in his gold mines until they died of exhaustion. If an "Indian" worker did not deliver his full quota of gold dust by Columbus' deadline, soldiers would cut off the man's hands and tie them around his neck to send a message. Slavery was so intolerable for these sweet, gentle island people that at one point, 100 of them committedmass suicide. Catholic law forbade the enslavement of Christians, but Columbus solved this problem. He simply refused to baptize the native people of Hispaniola.

On his second trip to the New World, Columbus brought cannons and attack dogs. If a native resisted slavery, he would cut off a nose or an ear. If slaves tried to escape, Columbus had them burned alive. Other times, he sent attack dogs to hunt them down, and the dogs would tear off the arms and legs of the screaming natives while they were still alive. If the Spaniards ran short of meat to feed the dogs, Arawak babies were killed for dog food.

Columbus' acts of cruelty were so unspeakable and so legendary - even in his own day - that Governor Francisco De Bobadilla arrested Columbus and his two brothers, slapped them into chains, and shipped them off to Spain to answer for their crimes against the Arawaks. But the King and Queen of Spain, their treasury filling up with gold, pardoned Columbus and let him go free.

One of Columbus' men, Bartolome De Las Casas, was so mortified by Columbus' brutal atrocities against the native peoples, that he quit working for Columbus and became a Catholic priest. He described how the Spaniards under Columbus' command cut off the legs of children who ran from them, to test the sharpness of their blades. According to De Las Casas, the men made bets as to who, with one sweep of his sword, could cut a person in half. He says that Columbus' men poured people full of boiling soap. In a single day, De Las Casas was an eye witness as the Spanish soldiers dismembered, beheaded, or raped 3000 native people. "Such inhumanities and barbarisms were committed in my sight as no age can parallel," De Las Casas wrote. "My eyes have seen these acts so foreign to human nature that now I tremble as I write."

De Las Casas spent the rest of his life trying to protect the helpless native people. But after a while, there were no more natives to protect. Experts generally agree that before 1492, the population on the island of Hispaniola probably numbered above 3 million. Within 20 years of Spanish arrival, it was reduced to only 60,000. Within 50 years, not a single original native inhabitant could be found.

In 1516, Spanish historian Peter Martyr wrote: "... a ship without compass, chart, or guide, but only following the trail of dead Indians who had been thrown from the ships could find its way from the Bahamas to Hispaniola."

Christopher Columbus derived most of his income from slavery, De Las Casas noted. In fact, Columbus was the first slave trader in the Americas. As the native slaves died off, they were replaced with black slaves. Columbus' son became the first African slave trader in 1505.

Are you surprised you never learned about any of this in school? I am too. Why do we have this extraordinary gap in our American ethos? Columbus himself kept detailed diaries, as did some of his men including De Las Casas and Michele de Cuneo. (If you don't believe me, just Google the words Columbus, sex slave, and gold mine.)

Columbus' reign of terror is one of the darkest chapters in our history. The REAL question is: Why do we celebrate a holiday in honor of this man? (Take three deep breaths. If you're like me, your stomach is heaving at this point. I'm sorry. Sometimes the truth hurts. That said, I'd like to turn in a more positive direction.)

Call me crazy, but I think holidays ought to honor people who are worthy of our admiration, true heroes who are positive role models for our children. If we're looking for heroes we can truly admire, I'd like to offer a few candidates. Foremost among them are school kids.

Let me tell you about some school kids who are changing the world. I think they are worthy of a holiday. My friend Nan Peterson is the director of the Blake School, a K-12 school in Minnesota. She recently visited Kenya. Nan says there are 33 million people in Kenya... and 11 million of them are orphans! Can you imagine that? She went to Kibera, the slum outside Nairobi, and a boy walked up to her and handed her a baby. He said: My father died. My mother died... and I'm not feeling so good myself. Here, take my sister. If I die, they will throw her into the street to die.

There are so many orphans in Kenya, the baby girls are throwaways!

Nan visited an orphanage for girls. The girls were starving to death. They had one old cow that only gave one cup of milk a day. So each girl only got ONE TEASPOON of milk a day!

After this heartbreaking experience, Nan went home to her school in Minnesota and asked the kids... what can we do? The kids got the idea to make homemade paper and sell it to buy a cow. So they made a bunch of paper, and sold the paper, and when they were done they had enough money to buy... FOUR COWS! And enough food to feed all of the cows for ONE FULL YEAR! These are kids... from 6 years old to 18... saving the lives of kids halfway around the world. And I thought: If a 6-year-old could do that... what could I do?

At Casady School in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, seemingly "average" school kids raised $20,000 to dig clean water wells for children in Ethiopia. These kids are heroes. Why don't we celebrate "Kids Who Are Changing the Planet" Day?

Let me ask you a question: Would we celebrate Columbus Day if the story of Christopher Columbus were told from the point-of-view of his victims? No way!

The truth about Columbus is going to be a hard pill for some folks to swallow. Please, don't think I'm picking on Catholics. All the Catholics I know are wonderful people. I don't want to take away their holiday or their hero. But if we're looking for a Catholic our kids can admire, the Catholic church has many, many amazing people we could name a holiday after. How about Mother Teresa day? Or St. Francis of Assisi day? Or Betty Williams day (another Catholic Nobel Peace Prize winner). These men and women are truly heroes of peace, not just for Catholics, but for all of us.

Let's come clean. Let's tell the truth about Christopher Columbus. Let's boycott this outrageous holiday because it honors a mass murderer. If we skip the cute song about "In 1492 Columbus sailed the ocean blue," I don't think our first graders will miss it much, do you? True, Columbus' brutal treatment of peaceful Native Americans was so horrific... maybe we should hide the truth about Columbus until our kids reach at least High School age. Let's teach it to them about the same time we tell them about the Nazi death camps.

While we're at it, let's rewrite our history books. From now on, instead of glorifying the exploits of mass murderers like Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, Genghis Khan, and Napoleon Bonaparte, let's teach our kids about true heroes, men and women of courage and kindness who devoted their lives to the good of others. There's a long list, starting with Florence Nightingale, Mahatma Gandhi, Rev. Martin Luther King, and John F. Kennedy.

These people were not adventurers who "discovered" an island in the Caribbean. They were noble souls who discovered what is best in the human spirit

Thursday, May 8, 2014

a blog is...........

a blog is a blog is a blog as long as there's words in the space right? lol sometimes I wonder WHY I committed to do this every single day for a year but I'm almost at the halfway mark so I have to keep my head down and blinders on and just do it!
I ate............
country fried steak and gravy biscuit from hardees (2)
cool ranch doritos
meatball sub no sauce
spicy chiken breast sandwich
garlic chips
payday
so all junk all day but not a huge amount of food for a 24 hour period. I'm happy with my progress in portions and in knowing when I'm full. that's 3 meals and 1 snack for the breakdown.
I also got 10112 steps and I did 15 minutes of yoga (all the time I had)

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

hmmmmmmm

sometimes I just don't get it, I don't understand what sets people off and the irrational decisions they make..............oh well that's enough of that. :(
ok day, slept 9 hours so I feel well rested gonna try and repeat that today!
I ate:
apple fritter
meatball sub
handful of doritos
chicken soup
chicken breast
I got 10,438 steps
now I'm gonna watch some wild wild west I'm on season 2 and I need to finish asap cause my McMillan and wife series just got here! lol

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

a good show and fmm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=boxCrvDkxNM
we had a FANTASTIC show on the tarot talk last night, our special guest was james wanless creator of the voyager tarot. a super cool must have deck for anyone interested in tarot. I posted the link in case y'all missed it.
I ate out at cheddars yesterday so I had
Caesar Salad
honey glazed croissant (just 1)
cornmeal crusted catfish
fries (only 1/2 an order I brought the rest home and gave them away)
I must share that I did have 3 glasses of sweet tea (it was YUMMY!) I NEVER get calories/carbs from a beverage so that is unusual but I'm good with it.
flatbread crackers
beef bologna
handful of Cheetos.
I have stuck to the portion control instead of a plan because it's been working mayhaps I'm finally at that normal place where I actually recognize when I'm full. for me that's been the hardest part of this journey................
and now for FRIEND MAKIN MONDAYS

Friend Makin Mondays: Colors

I wanted to say a big thank you to Kenlie at All The Weigh, she hosted Friend Makin Mondays for a long time, and decided to take a break and I looked after it for a few months, after some discussion Kenlie said I did such a great job, that she officially handed it over to me to keep permanently.
FMM
So welcome to FMM’s new permanent home, and a nice new logo to go with it. Everything else is pretty much staying the same, but I would love some feedback from you guys, do you have any ideas to mix things up, or ideas for topics/questions? I would love to feature one of you a month with your questions. If you are interested please shoot me an email: sarah@losingweightandhavingfun.com
If you’ve taken part in FMM before then you are familiar with the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to read and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

Colors

1. When you look out of your nearest window – what is the first color you see?
black, my window is on the side of the house away from the streetlight so it's shrouded in shadow
2. How colorful was your last meal?
hmmmm lets see green for the lettuce, white for dressing, tan for croutons, pale yellow for parm cheese, brown for cornmeal catfish, the bread, and goldenish for the fries........not very! LMAO
3. What color is your car/bike/main mode of transport?
it's not mine it belongs to my roomies mom, but I drive a silver 2014 cruze
4. What color clothes are you wearing?
the clothes of the Gods, yep that's right I am skyclad
5. If you have pets – what color are they?
my scorpion is black and my spider is brown with a pinkish hue to the tips, I also have a white fish with an orange saddle
6. What color is your hair?
a medium dark brown but I have tons of red pigment (mama had black hair daddy was a ginger)





7. What color ink do you prefer to write in?
black and I admit I'm a gel-pen snob at this point!
8. What color is your favorite sports team?
LMAO I'm soooooooooooo not gonna go where my warped thinking might take me so as to not offend anyone, so i'll say red and white for the Alabama crimson tide, that way I only offend auburn fans and no one cares about them anyway! LMAO
9. What color are your favorite pair of shoes?
red and black, they're a custom pair of Elvira shoes I had made. they cost $140 dollars and worth every penny (actually my lovely friend shawnna gave me $100 so it cost me $40)

   
10. What is your favorite flower and if it comes in multiple colors what is your favorite color?
iris, I love all of em but the purple just make me swoon they're so beautiful!
   
Have a fabulous Monday and don’t forget to come back and post a link to your blog post in the comments so I can see how colorful your life is :)
Sarah xxx
 

Monday, May 5, 2014

busted blood vessel

well I've decided my eye has a busted blood vessel there's no real pain just a bit of light sensitivity and of course it looks horrible. I've been resting extra and trying not to strain it so limiting computer time/tv/reading (NOT easy for me) that bein said lets keep this short and sweet
I consumed:
chicken breast
American cheese
town house flatbread crackers, roasted garlic flavor
beef jerky
ham
peanut butter ( chunky)
atkins coconut bar
that's all, no clue how few steps I got didn't bother with the ped. and I never even opened the door so it's a miniscule number at best. ok time for another nap, I slept from 3 till 11 then woke up watched one episode of wild wild west and was so sleepy I turned off the tv and fell asleep on the floor for another 3 hours, been up about an hour and goin back down again!~ LOVE a day of rest and recovery!

Sunday, May 4, 2014

cra-cra

so it was cra cra at work two people called out on 2nd shift so NOTHING was done, thank goodness for Keisha coming in to help me out! luckily I like busy so I just kept it happy and kept going and now I'm off for 2 days and today I have no intention of leaving the house at all!
I ate:
cheeseburger (nasty at work) lol
cheesy garlic brad chips (sm bag)
country fried steak biscuit with gravy (2)
coconut egg (left over easter candy)
beef jerky
cheddar cheese crackers (pack)
my main concern now is my right eye is VERY bloodshot and that's the eye I hadthe issue with last year. there's no pain but it doesn't seem to be clearing up, gonna keep on top of it and not let it get bad like before I don't wanna end up in the emergency room again, and of course I just paid that off last month! LMAO cest le vie!

Saturday, May 3, 2014

i forgot

I forgot...........to eat! WTF?! that's never happened ever! lolol I ate around 6:30 yesterday and then had a snack at 9 and didn't eat anything else till 2am today! imagine that. I was at work and I got queasy and was trying to figure out why when it dawned on me.
so I ate .........
1/4 pd beef dog (twas nasty apparently my tastes are changing and I haven't eaten much beef)
garlic cheesy bread chips (sm bag)
mary sue vanilla butter egg (33cent clearance)
handful of Cheetos
sausage biscuit
that's it for a whole day!
gonna watch some wild wild west since I'm on the last disc of season 1. it seems to be taking me forever cause I can only watch a couple of episodes a day.
I actually have a day off tomorrow with nary a planned thing to do! first time in a long time , so I'm probably gonna catch up on reading, tv, and do some in depth research on the voyager tarot by james wanless cause he's our guest on this weeks tarot talk at 7pm eastern Monday.
y'all have a GREATday now ya hear!

Friday, May 2, 2014

16520

16520 steps and my dogs are barking! it was BUSY BUSY and I like it that way passes the time and makes me feel like I accomplished something.
it was so busy eating wasn't going to happen so I only ate....
pork steak
ramen noodles with parm cheese/butter
payday
Italian sausage
ham steak (1/2 piece)
I finally got some sleep almost 10 hours and I remembered to take some aleve all the rain had made my joints swell up , so they've been popping and loosening all night. lolol and I feel bed calling my name so i'll probably get another 9 or 10 hours today..............of course I have to be careful I'm already so damn hot that much beauty sleep might be dangerous. I mean men could be overcome with my beauty and loose control of themselves! ;)

Thursday, May 1, 2014

prayers needed

hey y'all as you may know I'm from Alabama and they really need y'alls prayers. so far my family is ok but the tornados got pretty gosh darn close.
on the good side I'm doin fine with just cutting back so I'm sticking to that a bit longer, I was down another pound to 208 this week.
I ate..........
headliner sandwich, the specialty of the dover newsstand cafĂ© it's 2 slices of grilled buttered texas toast, ham, and bacon with lettuce and tomato and their "secret" sauce. so gosh darn yummy, I also had mayhaps 8 fries I gave most of them away cause I was getting full ( a novel/new experience)
Italian sausage
chicken tenders (5) over the course of 4 hours it was just too busy to eat
and this morning I'm having a grilled cheese with bacon for supper
things are picking up with doing readings as the weather improves and I'm SLOWLY whittling my amazon cart down only 97 items left! LMAO there were n136 so I'm making progress this week I ordered the complete mcmillion and wife series, the labyrinth tarot deck, and something else cant for the life of me remember what, so it must have been VERY important!
oh yeah I got 7287 steps it's still pouring here so I'm happy with that!